Do we actually know when it’s time to fly? Maybe it is exactly that moment when we feel glued to the tarmac, knowing full well that remaining as such our fate will be worse than any crash landing that could be coming up, having not even tried.
This might sound strange but I believe that our fears and strong objections make up the frontier of worthwhile life explorations.
Why is that?
In short, we can live perfectly peaceful lives, feeling safe and secure but are not necessarily growing.
We remain stuck. At the frontier that’s where there is opportunity for growth. But we need to face our challenges, not turn our backs on them. This includes internal as well as external challenges, what is going on around us and how we perceive what is going on within us, both.
Paying attention, we may realise that at the frontier what is really going on is that there is a conflict between what we think we want (what the mental, or mind, wants) and what our heart knows we truly want. This leads us to understand that we are engaged in a fierce battle between two opposing forces, which might make us feel paralyzed – or at least unable to fly.
So, who do I support in the battle, when it is ‘me’ pitched against ‘me’?
In battles between me and someone else it’s easier, no questions asked. But when one aspect of me is in conflict with another aspect of me it is less clear-cut, right? The thought ‘can there even be a victory?’ makes us feel even more stuck.
To fly we need to follow our heart…
… and to do so requires that we listen to it speak. Often the heart doesn’t speak; it whispers ever so quietly and gently that we can easily overhear it.
Heart intelligence is unconditional whereas the mind has conditions and likes to trick you. Following our heart, we acknowledge our heart as our inner tutor, our real teacher. A honest heart connection removes the feeling of emptiness that the disconnectedness of different personalities within us has most likely brought about.
The heart is an expression of our soul and learning to listen to it and following its guidance will bring us to experience a more profound and deep joy. That’s the growth I refer to.
How to follow your Heart?
We might understand that it will be good to listen to our heart and want to step forward, but hesitate – not sure it will be ‘worth the cost’. So, whilst weighing up our choices, being indecisive, we become aware that there is a conflict. Edging nearer to refusing to remain stuck but to accept that there may be losses, pain… that we may end up feeling we made the wrong decision, the suffering intensifies.
Then, retreating to our heart is a great thing to do (I would like to suggest it is the only thing to do!), because the pain of separating from our heart will be greater than any other pain. It may seem like a lose-lose situation but the biggest win of them all will be in the vibrancy of your heart-connection.
Time to feel
Going on a retreat can help us to establish a heart connection. During a retreat we give ourselves the time and space to feel everything that is going on fully. Allowing the mind to cool down, we also give our heart and soul the space to become more ‘audible’. We may even remember previous times, or the last time, that we faced any discomforting emotions and experienced new energies rush into our lives. It may be true that there was pain, but it serves us well to remember how something new was born, too. Remembering what was new, marvellous even, can inspire us to keep going. It can remind us of why we shouldn’t ‘accept less’ but are better served by daring to take the leap, even into the unknown … and fly.
If you are not able to take some time off for a retreat, try a long walk in nature, which is also a kind of retreat. Mother Nature is known for connecting us with our heart energy.
If you get stuck on the thoughts ‘what will so-and-so think?’ remember:
No one in the entire world can do a better job of being you than you.
Ps 1. I have indeed flown off to the south of India, and am writing this from my soul home Auroville – during my own devised retreat of sorts. Check it out here: www.auroville.org.
Ps 2. For some instant further inspiration on heart connection and practical steps do watch the video “Journey into Your Heart (Behind the Scenes with Lee)”: https://youtu.be/QpA88aGXP-o where he talks about talking to your heart, as opposed to ‘only’ listening to it. Your heart intelligence holds all your answers your mind is unable to give you.
Interested to read more? Food for your Soul is a regular column featuring short articles for moments of reflection to look at life from a different perspective (should you choose to!). Invest 3 minutes and allow your thoughts to ponder. Awareness creates choice.